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作者(zhe)︰shyungchongzeng 來源︰文(wen)章閱讀網(wang) 時間︰2020-04-05 08:49 閱讀︰

 Dear Daughter:
  As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.

當(dang)我們qiang) 凳shi)出哥(ge)倫比(bi)亞大學的時候,我想(xiang)寫(xie)一封信給你(ni),告訴你(ni)盤旋在我腦中的想(xiang)法。

  First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.

首先(xian),我想(xiang)告訴你(ni)我們為你(ni)感到特別驕傲。進入哥(ge)倫比(bi)亞大學證明(ming)你(ni)是qie)桓鋈 娣 溝撓判閶  ni)的學業、藝術(shu)和(he)社交技能最近都有卓(zhuo)越的表現(xian),無論是你(ni)在微積分上得了最高分,完成(cheng)自己典雅的時尚的設計,成(cheng)功(gong)賣出繪(hui)制的跑鞋(xie),還是在“模擬聯合國”演(yan)說中成(cheng)為表現(xian)最突(tu)出的人之一,你(ni)毫(hao)無疑問已經是qie)桓齠duo)才(cai)多(duo)藝的女孩。你(ni)的父(fu)母為你(ni)感到驕傲,你(ni)也應該像我們qie)謊 約焊械階院饋

  I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that "father-daughter connection" which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.

我會永遠記得第(di)一次將(jiang)你(ni)抱(bao)在臂彎的na)且(qie)豢蹋 恢中孿始ji)動的感覺(jue)瞬(shun)間觸動了我的心,那是qie)恢鐘澇度夢姨兆淼母芯jue),就(jiu)是那種將(jiang)我們的一生都聯結在一起的“父(fu)女情結”。我也常常想(xiang)起我ye) 糯cui)眠(mian)曲(qu)輕搖(yao)你(ni)入睡,當(dang)我把你(ni)放下的時候,常常覺(jue)得既解脫(tuo)又惋(wan)惜(xi),一方(fang)面我想(xiang),她終于睡著了!另一方(fang)面,我又多(duo)麼希望自己可(ke)以多(duo)抱(bao)你(ni)一會兒。我還記得帶你(ni)到運(yun)動場(chang),看著你(ni)玩得那麼開心,你(ni)是那樣可(ke)愛,所有人都非常愛你(ni)。

  You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.


  You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.

你(ni)也是個很好(hao)的姐姐。雖然你(ni)們姐妹以前(qian)也會打架(jia),但(dan)是長大後,你(ni)們真的mou)晌 撕hao)朋(peng)友(you)妹妹很愛你(ni),很喜(xi)歡逗你(ni)笑(xiao),她把你(ni)當(dang)成(cheng)shang)陌bang)樣看待。我們qiang) A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/likai/index1.html">離開哥(ge)大後,她非常想(xiang)你(ni),我知道(dao)你(ni)也很想(xiang)她。世界上最寶(bao)貴的就(jiu)是家人。和(he)父(fu)母一樣,妹妹就(jiu)是你(ni)最可(ke)以信任的人。隨著年齡的增長,你(ni)們姐妹之間的情誼(yi)不變,你(ni)們互相照應,彼此關心,這就(jiu)是我最希望見到的事情了。在你(ni)的大學四(si)年,有空時你(ni)一定要常常跟妹妹視頻聊聊天,寫(xie)寫(xie)電子郵件。

  College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question "what good is this course". I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the materials taught isn't as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn't critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.

大學將(jiang)是你(ni)人生最重要的時光,在大學里你(ni)會發現(xian)學習的真諦xiao)Dni)以前(qian)經常會問到 “這個課程有什麼用”,這是個好(hao)問題,但(dan)是我希望你(ni)理解︰“教育的真諦就(jiu)是當(dang)你(ni)忘記qie)磺興(xing)?降畝 髦 笏O碌畝 鰲!蔽業囊yi)思是,最重要的不是你(ni)學到的具體(ti)的知識,而是你(ni)學習新事物和(he)解決新問題的na)芰ΑU獠cai)是大學學習的真正(zheng)意(yi)義(yi)——這將(jiang)是你(ni)從被動學習轉向(xiang)自主學習的階段,之後你(ni)會變成(cheng)一個很好(hao)的自學者(zhe)。所以,即便(bian)你(ni)所學的不是生活(huo)里所急(ji)需的,也要認真看待大學里的每一門功(gong)課,就(jiu)算學習的技能你(ni)會忘記,學習的na)芰κ悄ni)將(jiang)受用終身(shen)的。

  Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don't believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely "black and white", and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called "critical thinking", and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said "I don't agree with you, but I'll support you." After the years, I have learned this isn't just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.

不要被教條所束縛,任何問題都沒有一個唯一的簡單(dan)的答案。還記得當(dang)我幫助你(ni)高中的辯(bian)論課程時,我總是讓你(ni)站(zhan)在你(ni)不認可(ke)的na)且(qie)環fang)來辯(bian)論嗎?我這麼做的理由就(jiu)是希望你(ni)能夠理解︰看待一個問題不應該非黑即白,而是有很多(duo)方(fang)法和(he)角度qu)5dang)你(ni)意(yi)識到這點(dian)的時候,你(ni)就(jiu)會成(cheng)為一個很好(hao)的解決問題者(zhe)。這就(jiu)是“批判的思維”——你(ni)的一生都會需要的最重要的思考方(fang)式,這也意(yi)味著你(ni)還需要包容和(he)支持不同(tong)于你(ni)的其他觀點(dian)。我永遠記得我去找我的博士導師提出了一個新論題,他告訴我︰“我不同(tong)意(yi)你(ni),但(dan)我支持你(ni)。”多(duo)年後,我認識到這不僅僅是qian)藎 且(qie)恢峙惺剿伎跡 橇釗甦鄯牧斕擠綹瘢 xian)在這也變成(cheng)了我的一部分。我希望這也能成(cheng)為你(ni)的一部分。

  Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don't be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement, he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don't worry too much about what job you will have, and don't be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks "it's not useful" : ) Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.

在大學里你(ni)要追(zhui)隨自己的激(ji)情和(he)興(xing)趣,選你(ni)感興(xing)趣的課程,不要困擾于別人怎麼說或怎麼想(xiang)。史蒂夫•喬布斯曾經說過,在大學里你(ni)的熱(re)情會創造出很多(duo)點(dian),在你(ni)隨後的生命中你(ni)會把這些(xie)點(dian)串聯起來。在他著名的斯坦(tan)福(fu)畢業典禮演(yan)講中xiao) 倭艘桓齪芎hao)的例子︰他在大學里修了看似毫(hao)無用處的書法,而十年後,這成(cheng)了隻果Macintosh里漂(piao)亮字庫的基礎,而因為Macintosh有這麼好(hao)的字庫,才(cai)帶來了桌(zhuo)面出版和(he)今天的辦公(gong)軟件(例如微軟Office)。他對書法的探索就(jiu)是qie)桓齙dian),而隻果Macintosh把多(duo)個點(dian)聯結成(cheng)了一條線(xian)。所以不要太擔心將(jiang)來你(ni)要做什麼樣的工作,也不要太急(ji)功(gong)近利。假如你(ni)喜(xi)歡日語或韓語,就(jiu)去學吧(ba),即使你(ni)爸爸曾認為那沒什麼用︰)盡興(xing)地(di)選擇你(ni)的點(dian)吧(ba),要有信念有一天機緣dao)戳lin)時,你(ni)會找到自己的人生使命,畫(hua)出一條美麗的曲(qu)線(xian)。

  Do your best in classes, but don't let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don't graduate with honors. So please don't give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don't be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.

在quan) 紊弦﹥×Γ dan)不要給自己太多(duo)壓(ya)力。你(ni)媽媽和(he)我在成(cheng)績上對你(ni)沒什麼要求,只要你(ni)能順(shun)利畢業並在這四(si)年里學到了些(xie)東西,我們就(jiu)會很高興(xing)了。即便(bian)你(ni)畢業時沒有獲(huo)得優異的mou)杉  ni)的哥(ge)倫比(bi)亞學位也將(jiang)帶你(ni)走(zou)得很遠。所以別給自己壓(ya)力。在你(ni)高中生活(huo)的最後幾fu)鱸攏 蛭 ya)力比(bi)較xian)。 笱 昵胍步 耍 ni)過得很開心,但(dan)是在最近的幾fu)魴xing)期,你(ni)好(hao)像開始緊張起來。(你(ni)注意(yi)到你(ni)緊張時會咬指甲嗎?)千萬別擔心,最重要的是你(ni)在學習,你(ni)需要的唯一衡量是你(ni)的努力程度qu)3cheng)績只不過是虛榮的人用以吹噓(xu)和(he)慵懶的人所恐懼(ju)的無聊數字而已,而你(ni)既不虛榮也不慵懶。

  Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don't worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don't stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.

最重要的是在大學里你(ni)要交一些(xie)朋(peng)友(you),快樂生活(huo)。大學的朋(peng)友(you)往往是生命中最好(hao)的朋(peng)友(you),因為在大學里你(ni)和(he)朋(peng)友(you)能夠近距離交往。另外,在一塊兒成(cheng)長,一起獨立,很自然地(di)你(ni)們就(jiu)會緊緊地(di)系在一起,成(cheng)為密友(you)。你(ni)應該挑選一些(xie)真誠誠懇的朋(peng)友(you),跟他們親近,別在乎他們的愛好(hao)、成(cheng)績、外表甚(shen)至性格。你(ni)在高中的最後兩年已經交到了一些(xie)真正(zheng)的朋(peng)友(you),所以盡可(ke)以相信自己的直覺(jue),再交一些(xie)新朋(peng)友(you)吧(ba)。你(ni)是qie)桓穌娉系娜耍 魏穩碩薊嵯xi)歡跟你(ni)做朋(peng)友(you)的,所以要自信、外向(xiang)、主動一點(dian),如果你(ni)喜(xi)歡某(mou)人,就(jiu)告訴她,就(jiu)算她拒絕了,你(ni)也沒有xing)鶚shi)什麼。以最大的善意(yi)去對人,不要有成(cheng)見,要寬容。人無完人,只要他們很真誠,就(jiu)信任他們,對yun)怯you)善。他們將(jiang)給你(ni)相同(tong)的回報,這是我ye)曬gong)的秘密——我以誠待人,信任他人(除非他們做了失(shi)信于我的事)。有人告訴這樣有時我會被佔(zhan)ji)bian)宜,他們是對的,但(dan)是我可(ke)以告訴你(ni)︰以誠待人讓我得到的遠遠超過我失(shi)去的。在我做管理的18年里,我學到一件很重要的事——要想(xiang)得到他人的信任和(he)尊重,只有先(xian)re)?湃魏he)尊重他人。無論是管理、工作、交友(you),這點(dian)都值得你(ni)參考。

  Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.


  Start planning for your summers early what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.


  Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver's seat this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you'll love it!


  I told your mom I'm writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: "just ask her to take care of herself." Simple but deeply caring that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don't feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.

我告訴你(ni)媽媽我在寫(xie)這封信,問她有什麼想(xiang)對你(ni)說的,她想(xiang)了想(xiang),說“讓她好(hao)好(hao)照顧自己”,很簡單(dan)卻(que)飽(bao)含著真切的關心——這一向(xiang)是你(ni)深愛的媽媽的特點(dian)。這短短的一句話,是她想(xiang)提醒你(ni)很多(duo)事情,比(bi)如要記得自己按時吃藥(yao),好(hao)好(hao)睡覺(jue),保持健康的飲食,適量運(yun)動,不舒服的時候要去看醫(yi)生等等qu)V泄芯涔gu)語,說“ba)shen)體(ti)發膚(fu),受之父(fu)母fu) 桓一hui)傷(shang),孝之始也”。這句話的意(yi)思用比(bi)較xian)碌姆fang)法詮(quan)釋(shi)就(jiu)是說︰父(fu)母最愛的就(jiu)是你(ni),所以照顧好(hao)自己就(jiu)是孝順(shun)最好(hao)的方(fang)法。當(dang)你(ni)成(cheng)為母親的na)翹歟 ni)就(jiu)會理解這些(xie)。在那天之前(qian),听媽媽的,你(ni)一定要好(hao)好(hao)照顧自己。

  College is the four years where you have:

  •the greatest amount of free time


  •the first chance to be independent


  •the most flexibility to change


  •the lowest risk for making mistakes


  So please treasure your college years make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.


  When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said "bonne chance", which means "good luck" and "good courage". Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.

當(dang)我在2005年面對人生最大的挑戰時,你(ni)給了我大大的擁dang)? 垢宜盜艘瘓浞ㄓ鎩onne chance”。這句話代表“祝你(ni)勇(yong)敢,祝你(ni)好(hao)運(yun)!”現(xian)在,我也想(xiang)跟你(ni)說同(tong)樣的話,bonne chance,我的天使和(he)公(gong)主,希望哥(ge)倫比(bi)亞成(cheng)為你(ni)一生中最快樂的四(si)年,希望你(ni)成(cheng)為你(ni)夢想(xiang)成(cheng)為的人!


      Dad (& Mom)


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